How to keep your mom from effecting your energy or anyone else as a matter of fact.
I just got off the phone with my mom, my mind begins to race. During the conversation, she asks me again when am I going to divorce my husband, he is not up to my “level’? For a hot second I think yes, she is right I need someone else who can “support” me better, who makes more money, who is….. the list goes on and on. But then I catch myself.
A few days go by, I call her again, this time I ask her for a table I gave her a few years ago, now that I have my new house I have space for the table, I need for my office. She starts ranting about how perfect the table looks, in her third home, and that I gave it to her, she becomes irate and hangs up the phone on me.
She leaves me feeling angry, frustrated, guessing myself, again, maybe I should be nicer and just give her the table.
My mind falls into a cycle of going back and forth between different scenarios. It’s mine, my mom has three houses and enough money to decorate each one as she pleases. I can barely pay the rent and she NEEDs that table?! Of course, I am right and she is so selfish.
But then I become aware of the fact that I have stepped out from my home base. My place of peace. Where I feel the best and I can show up to the world as I have chosen to be a loving, caring, giving person.
A tiny bit of light starts to come into my moment of living in fear, which means anything that is separate from LOVE.
I go into my mental tool box and begin to search for the RIGHT mindset to help me out of this emotional cycle I am in.
So here is where my healing comes in.
I can stay angry at her, I can go get my table and move on. Now for many people this might just be what your answer is and good.
But for me I have a calling within me that growing into a strong spiritual person. I am choosing to feel more emotions of love and kindness. This is the path I am choosing for my life.
If I build up the angry and get into a fight with her then I building up more emotional baggage that I eventually hold on to. I get my body and mind with being ok with angry and frustration. I build this muscle of my emotional repertoire. This energy then exists in me and I become more of it.
But I am learning that if I want something different then I need to be something different. I need to rewire my emotional baseline, and I have chosen to be being of love and light.
So I have to find the right tools that will help me see and be this.
Lets go back to my mom telling me to divorce my husband and me thinking about it. First of all how do I solidify a relationship when I let those types of thoughts creap into my mind. How do I build a strong relationship with this ability to walk away because he does not make enough money.
As I learn to be a spiritual teacher I know that love trumps everything and I have to act in a loving way to build a loving relationship. Thinking about if he makes enough money is a place of fear and sense of lack verses really building a relationship on love and that takes different flexing of muscles and it always go back to who do I choose to be. No matter what happens in the future I have act in love right now. I have to be a person that knows love is more important then money.
Now what about the table.
Lets say that I decide to stay angry at her. My ego is satisfied I continue to KNOW that I am right. Ahhhhhh the pleasure of my ego are satifisied. I get my table and I move on……but do I really?
Sometimes it is not that easy. Sometimes I feel even though your EGO might feel really satisfied you still question everything. I guess I did tell her she could have the table, maybe I should be nicer and give her the table.
I keep going a around in my head, it has totally taken up my peace of mind thinking about this situation. Now I know not everyone is the same, someone else can just either give her the table and not think about it again or take the table and not think about it again.
But I do know that EVERYONE has the things that make them upset and allow their minds to ruminate between angry, frustration, and loss of peace of mind.
This happens ALL the time, for all kinds of different reasons everyone has THEIR thing that makes them feel frustrated.
So what do we do about it, how do we move past the frustration, angry, depression, shock, what ever it is. I am going to share with you a way to find more PEACE in your life no matter what the situation is.
There are always two ways to look at things. Through the eyes of the EGO and through the eyes of SPIRIT.
The Ego is the expression of self, the one that has a right or wrong. The part of us that has entitlement. The part of us that has judgement. Question.
But then there is the other side of us that is PURE spirit, energy, a network of light that is not visible from the naked eye.
This spirit is PURE love, full of compassion, but the thing is we have to choose who we want to be. We have to choose to step into the the energy of spirit. It is a choice and has to be practiced. You don’t just say to want to be more loving and kind and then expect it to just show up. You have to practice it all times.
I have made the decision to take control of my life and be the person I choose to be. It is a reflection I have every day.